Hash Trash 2011

Hash Trash - number 1481 FEB 6, 2012

Hares: Enema Queen & Brazilian Lawn

Hello hashers. Not sure why it's me writing this. Must have been standing without a beer in my hand looking intelligent and charming. That'll teach me.

So, there was a hash. But of course the trail was awful. Creamy cone claimed there was NO PAPER! And we're not talking about provisions in the toilets. Desperate felt it was 'a bit random'. But then when you look at the group that makes up the DarHHH that kind of sums up the crowd. Ms P Pockets reminded us all that the Zanzee Bar hash (never heard of it, sounds like a hang out for country dancers if you ask me) is NEXT Saturday 18th. Apparently it's meat at 3pm by the big tree opposite Mer.. something. Not sure if its steaks or mishikaki. So anyway, the general extended debacle that is the circle commenced; candyman was looking for a snip, meanwhile nuts4love had her passage blocked by head gaskett whilst wounded knee proclaimed to all that he had a vast collection of red dresses available for the valentines hash.

It was wonderful to have Jesus visiting of course, although he has still failed to purchase a proper pair of shorts and insists on parading around in his grandson's boxers. Rockclimber made an excellent attempt at hash-innovation with a singing and beat-box combo. Not sure if anyone else knew what his ginger brain was expecting but needless to say it was a disaster, and try as she might she of the tunes Fiona Kennedy was unable to rescue the feature, despite an admirable late entry from flatulence on the human beatbox... which is not, contrary to hash-belief, standing over someone kicking them in the ribs.

The climber of rocks was held to account for the needless disposal of the amber liquid and admirably downed his cupful in 7 seconds, just shy of his record for longevity in the bedroom. At least he's consistent.

Excellent to see so many virgins. Clearly we'll be lucky to see any of them again although its just possible they will forget the abuse they received over time: Rick (virgin for the 2nd time, whatever that means), Nate, Mike (lover of the tricycle who cunningly gave nothing away on that front), Daniel, Fiona ('now an alcoholic') and Twiggy. Welcome!

And finally (yes, the circle did eventually end, but not until about 2 in the morning) the honour of hash shit was rested jointly upon the GM, Cockroach and the RA, Rockclimber.

Thanks to Hitler for hosting.

On on!

Inspector Gadget